Tag Archives: thanksgiving

Today’s Word is… BANKSGIVING

So I was chillin out maxin relaxin all cool one day when I had stumbled upon this tweet:

At first glance I found it to be ridiculous. Charging your own family for Thanksgiving dinner? That’s absurd. Thanksgiving is (about remembering that time Native Americans learned the hard way about trusting white people) about family and togetherness. Reflecting on the year and being grateful for the things and people you have in your life. And then there’s Grandmamauntie, working tirelessly preparing a 6 course Thanksgiving meal for free.99. All she asked was that you showed up and didn’t bring a white woman home. (Kidding, of course… Maybe… Grandmamauntie still has some things she needs to sort out, and she doesn’t believe in therapy. You’ll deal cuz the greens is lit.) Grandmamauntie would never charge a cover for Thanksgiving; she cooks with love. (Don’t show up at people’s houses empty handed tho, have some couth) How would she look charging people on the one day that even the homeless eat for free. I’ve hosted dinners and cookouts and well…..they ain’t cheap, B. Of course I never thought about how much it cost because it’s family and friends and who does that?

But now, We live in an age where people think tweeting a thread is labor and (panhandling) getting paid for it. If that’s the case, then damnit Run. Grandmamauntie. her. coin. #Banksgiving. The game done changed. The price of the brick going up. And you know why? Because we don’t use pre shredded cheddar cheese in the macaroni we want smoked gruyere and gouda you know how much a lb of smoked gouda cost? Then your cousin is vegan this month because she has a vacation coming up, you ain’t get invited but now gotta accommodate. Your uncle’s new girlfriend has a gluten allergy so you can’t have the Hawaiian rolls out. You and her went to school together, she ain’t have no damn allergy. Your sister’s “roommate” packed 2 plates before you learned their name. Then there’s the auntie who is only there to pitch her pyramid scheme. Your other cousin brought a bottle of Svedka but then took the Remy to the face. Him and his friend “took a walk” and now they broke off turkey legs. Your sister hovering around snapchatting all the food like, “get you a me”, she ain’t make nothing. She brought plates. And Grandmamauntie takes it all in stride because she only sees y’all once a year because everyone has a her blocked on Facebook because she keeps sending game invites. You’d pay the 30 just to not have to unblock her.

I’m curious how it would work logistically….do you make an eventbrite link or charge at the door? I gotta text a cousin to get on the VIP list and get white meat? Is there reserved seating? I’m not paying $30 to be at the kids table. Maybe get a wristband. Does Grandmamauntie got a Venmo? Does the $30 allow for to go plates or you gotta eat everything there like at the sushi bar. What if it’s my second stop and I’m not that hungry, can I pay $10 to see everybody? If the stuffing is dry can I get it taken off my order? Are ladies free before 5? Can I get in with jeans and sneakers? I have all the preguntas, for this new world order. Or perhaps even simpler…don’t host Thanksgiving if you can’t afford to host Thanksgiving. Do a potluck. Whatever you do, don’t let pay me for my emotional labor Twitter have you getting exiled from the family.

Happy Thanksgiving.

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… THANKFUL

Yup it’s one of those posts….

My family first and foremost

A God that loves me in spite of constant doubting

My friends who stuck around, and the ones who no longer felt the need to keep up the charade and showed their true colors

Good  health and credit…a couple years ago I probably weighed more than my credit score

That Superstorm Sandy missed Massachusetts almost entirely, prayers for the areas not so lucky

That Beyonce made an instagram

My apartment

My sorta kinda but not really but in the right lighting and if i inhale you can see abs

Black soap

The Dark Knight Rises on Blu Ray

That Kendrick Lamar put out an album this year and Lil Wayne didn’t

My President is still black (and he’s come with gifts)

That nerds are in now \o/

No oops babies

All my e-boos have skype so i won’t end up on MTV’s Catfish

I found gainful employment before I started to consider retail

My hairline isn’t receding

I don’t see a viable threat to the Patriots getting back to the Superbowl

Being able to play Mario Kart 64 on my phone

This 30 in 30 challenge, which has kept me very busy

Green grapes

3000+ twitter followers

Boobs

Sparkling water

Moderate good looks

and of course all my readers…you make me a blogger and not some dude writing in a diary, love you all

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… THINSGIVING

According to my diet-not diet plan, I’m still on schedule.  I’ve lost 6.6 lbs in 2 1/2 weeks.  But now comes the boss battle: Thanksgiving.   The time for food, fun, family and football.  As you know I aim to keep my meal plans as unlimited as realistically possible, especially since I’m doing this by myself; if I set too many strict rules I will break them. Who’s gon stop me? Me? I’m not going to beat myself up like I’m Jim Carrey before he started doing all those sappy dramatic movies chasing an Oscar.  So I will have cheesecake, my egg nog, my turkey with gravy.  But I will set some guidelines as well to assure I still have a thinning Thanksgiving…a Thinsgiving if you will…

WEDNESDAY

Pre-day Fast- I’m an intermittent intermittent faster.  Some days I commit to it 2 days a week, others no so much.  But tomorrow it’s nothing but water and maybe small veggie portions.

Breffis.

THURSDAY 

High Fiber Breakfast- After fasting, to avoid going ham at Thanksgiving I will refuel with a high fiber breakfast, probably oatmeal with apples and nuts.

Workouts- Today is naturally my rest day but I think I will work out today and rest tomorrow since I’ll be fasting and don’t want to do both in the same day.  Thursday I will get a workout in the morning, and try to sneak something in after eating, maybe I’ll bring my PS Move or something.

Portions- I cook with plenty of low fat ingredients so I don’t worry about portions as much as I should.  However ,since I’m not cooking I have no idea whats going to be in anything I’m eating, so to be safe eat a little of everything.

Mingle and stuff- An easy way to not overeat is to stay busy, talk and mingle with friends and family and not just stuff my face with food and alcohol because some drama is bound to go down and just want to stay out of it and not get drunk quickly so you dont have to go pick no one up or go to the store

Alcohol- I’ll go with wine, drink my L straight, and not get so riled up over the Patriots game I get too drunk I forget all about this guide

Seriously, you not going to make any sacrifices- Okay no dark meat, cranberry sauce, or sweet potatoes…

You don’t like those anyway- Fine, no stuffing, chips/dip, or egg nog…

Don’t become this person.

FRIDAY

Requiem- Thursday will be bad enough, but if go and do the same thing Friday and Saturday then I’ll surely see it on the scale the next Monday.  I fully intend to enjoy my holiday, and my holiday alone.  Friday it is back to business as usual.  I’m realistic that I probably won’t lose three pounds this week but if I come out this weekend even at the same weight I was prior I’ll take it as a win.

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… DIET

I’m not a dieter, somebody lied. I got a whopper in the car, with some fries.  *Rick Ross grunt*  I actually hate whoppers, mayonnaise bleh.  As some may know, I’m on a tear to lose 100 lbs by the end of 2012. I’m about 25 lbs away (currently weighing in at 227, no Marla Gibbs) with 2 months to go and statistically speaking as things go currently, I will fall short (i lose about 1.8-2.2 lbs/wk =14.4-17.6 lbs, so maybe I’ll just lie and threaten people to keep up the lie like Lance Armstrong).  However, that’s on my current path, which isn’t the most neatly paved one.  I eat what I want, when I want and pretty much cancel it out via fasting and intense workouts.  Going forward, I will take a better road, becoming a little more aware of what I’m eating.  I won’t call it a diet however; diets to me I think about sweating bullets resisting the urge to eat a cookie. Damn that I’m a grown man, if I want a cookie, I’ll eat a cookie. What the following is more of a manly masculine male guide to follow for the next 58 days *cue explosions, chainsaws , bikini clad women and pitbull barks*

awwww yeah.

You don’t win friends with salad: That line alone is why “Lisa the Vegetarian” is still my favorite Simpsons episode, that and “Homer versus the 18th amendment”,  I’d actually pay for my own Netflix account if they had The Simpsons on there…okay I’m rambling.  If you’re out with people you’re not thinking about healthy food choices, especially if you’re with the homies.  Simple solution, bring lunch instead of going out with coworkers, find other date activities besides dinner.

Nothing fried, died and laid to the side: This something I been doing actually, give or take a few times I just wasn’t trying to wait 50 years to bake chicken.  Being able to grill also helped but now summer’s over I don’t want to fall into the habit of frying food.  I haven’t bought oil in a while and I’m not a fan of cooking spray so without the means it’s kind of hard for me to do anyway

Taking out Take Out: Easier said than done, I’m incredibly lazy. Most of the time I get fast food its because I don’t want to cook or don’t want to wash dishes.

 The cliche of all cliches, eat your vegetables.  I eat plenty of fruit but I need to sneak in more vegetables into more meals besides dinner.  Load up an omelette with some, snack on carrots instead of grapes, and I could have a v8 but they’re gross.

 

 

Blame it on the Alcohol: If Diddy released a Ciroc Zero today, I’d write him for President on Tuesday.  I’m not a big drinker anyways but I will limit drinking at almost all costs.  Light beer tastes like disappointment anyways.

White Power: I haven’t ate too much red meat period, going forward I will cut it out completely.  Pork as well (i know i know its not red meat but still bye bacon).

Black Power:  All white is not created equalI will also cut white rice, white bread and white pasta, in favor of brown rice and whole grains

Then there’s, logging food to stay accountable, continuing my normal exercise routine, and no cheat meals; there’s a day for that called “Thanksgiving” coming up.  We’ll see where I am when its all said and done, maybe I’ll give an update next month assuming i’m not failing miserably.  It’s still not a diet tho.

#loselikeaman

-Stan-

 

 

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