Tag Archives: ghetto

Today’s Word is… BOUGIE

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Swag.

So an acquaintance invites me out, I figure what the hell and roll thru. Anyway, I’m on my way to meet him and a couple associates at this lounge, I hear someone yell “oh shit” “bllllllllaaaaat”, I look across the street, it’s some homies from around the way.  I go over to them talk for a bit, like one dude I didn’t know like that legit broke down my whole outfit, like “i see you, got fresh cut, button up, shoes, cuff links….” (like who even notices cufflinks, I swear he was so ready to rob me, he knew better, dont let these non prescription glasses that just completed the look fool you).  Anyway, they ask what I’m bout to get into

“I’m about to hit up Emerald”
“That’s that new lounge, there be some thangs over there?”
“Idk this gonna be my first time”
“Oh ok then, we gotta get up, you aint too bougie for the hood now?”
“Watch that sh t. Anyway, I was out there like last week (more like 3 weeks ago and none of them were there but still), i just dont be in the city like that”
“Oh yeah you out in the boonies now too, you only come to THIS part of town”
“You here too”
“(Redacted) got this white girl out here, college bitch, there bout to be a party over there, get some college girls” (He’s like 30 i believe)
“Iight let me know how that is”

We all exchange numbers because they cant keep a damn phone on to save their lives, and I go about my business.  That whole conversation made me feel some type of way.  Particularly the “bougie” label.  Granted other people have called me bougie, or mocked bougie things i’m into but I didn’t like how HE made that reference.  There’s a difference between playfully ribbing listening to Goapele and implying i’m “too good” for anything or anyone. A difference between trying to expand my social circle and forgetting where I came from.  I’ll always be T-Mac with tales I’ll never tell here but I’ll never be T-Mac, a 30 year old “O.G.” hitting up college parties.  That makes me “bougie” so be it.

Bougie is one of those terms I can’t ride with. I’m just about old enough to remember when it wasn’t an endearing term, in the same vein of newbreeds running around calling themselves “pretty boys” now, nah. I’ll divulge my own hypocrisy, I’ll poke fun at a friend who only drinks wine, eats kale or is from or plans to move to DC (but Stan, you wanna move to….shhh). In essence its in jest, not being separatist. Perhaps he was as well, but he don’t know me like that. Personally, I don’t really see the difference between owning being “bougie” and being told you “act white”. Yet bougie is the new black, pretty sure its the most popular term in the black blogosphere (because merely blogging makes you bougie now, cant a ninja just opine). There’s about 50 lem lists about things bougie black people do (apologies if you read the title and thought this was the case here) and even Buzzfeed set Twitter ablaze with a How Bougie are You quiz (i scored quite low actually….thug life?). The spectrum is set at ratchet and bougie, and you can find me in the middle with a du rag listening to Jeezy, drinking almond milk, blogging on my neighbors WiFi, with a USB keyboard because my laptop is missing keys. (Or on mt smartphone in a suit sipping Starbucks tea)Guess that makes me Boughetto (with a soft g, hard g sounds fake elitist)

-Stänley le Gémini

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… RATCHET

I hate how much I love this new Juicy J album.  It’s ignorance at it’s finest, not even in a ignorant rapper who’s somewhat oblivious making ratchet music under the guise of “I just want to tell my story”, Juicy J’s “Stay Trippy” is pure unadulterated ratchetness and I’m here for it. Ratchet hip hop is a guilty pleasure of mine, most of it is so bad it’s magnificent. Yesterday I gave a peek into my nerdy side, so I minds well show the other side of the coin, I am a Gemini after all. While I consider myself an intellectual there’s just some thing I can’t shake whether it’s from childhood or just entertains me as an adult….so allow me to list my 10…..15….20? Idk how many I’ll just spitball them until I run out of ideas, ratchet things someone of a grown man 160+ I.Q. shouldn’t like but does.

Aforementioned Juicy J album- Sit still during Bandz a Make her Dance, I dare you.
Hot Mess Mondays on VH1– mostly blame Dessiner for this, but I’m here for all the brain cell killing television except Basketball Wives. I hate them all.
Tho”– If you read here or follow on twitter you know I use “tho” a lot, it just fits the end every sentence better than any punctuation can
Hood literature– Back in my aspiring novelist days I would read a lot of urban fiction to get a solid grasp for pacing and dialogue and build my confidence that I can sure write something of this caliber. Yet some novels just suck me in, despite the outlandish plots and dramatics.
Ramen Noodles the quintessential struggle food, that even if it has more salt than Donovan McNabb talking about RGIII, or the first bowl always tastes good then the next time tastes like Mountain bike tires and crushed dreams, they have a place in my shopping cart, every time.
Battle Raps on Youtube the 6th American major sport behind football, basketball, baseball, hockey and real world/road rules challenge
Crunk Music circa 2006 That jump up for no reason, step on someone’s Air Force music, and the soundtrack to most of my Sunday jogs
Jeezy ad-libs– Ayyyyye. Yeeeah. That’s Riiiiiight.
Kool Aid– Take ya mio and crystal light’s and shove it, red koolaid (because red is a flavor, don’t tell me different) owns.
Morning ratchet block– Jerry Springer, Maury, Steve, they’re horribly scripted and I should feel some type of way of 3 old white guys exploiting black people but when I have a day off I can’t help but watch
Twerkers on YouTube
Really Bad Movies– The poor acting, ridiculous plot, the obviously cheap production on some Netflix films, it’s unintentional comedy. Temptation is probably the worst movie I ever seen but damn if it’s not funny
Live Tweeting Award Shows-I can’t believe I used to watch these things without twitter….I had so much material in 05 which no one to share them with
Keeping VOSS and Ciroc bottles as decoration Actually that’s not even ratchet, that’s green.
Keeping Shoeboxes as storage I have Shoeboxes full of nothing and I own an empty filing cabinet, Brady keeps destroying my Shoeboxes now anyway, guess that’s an intervention
Sneaking food in the movie theater Why women have these huge purses if they not trying to carry a doggie bag in it
#blacktwitter– Off the wall and seemingly unemployed, some of my favorite follows on twitter have not one ounce of filter
Ratchet Podcasts– Audio versions of black twitter, for when I need a laugh at work
Flip Flops in public-Well public means within a mile radius, if you see me in a mall with socks and flip flops feel free to throat chop me
Hennessey– Idk if Hennessey is considered ratchet but I tend to only drink it when I’m in the hood so I’m counting it.

But you know besides those and a the others I’m ashamed to mention , I’m the farthest thing from ratchet. *finishes typing this on a usb keyboard he took from work because the r key on his laptop stopped working*

-Stan-

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