Tag Archives: drake

Today’s Word is… VIEWS

So, I miss her.  

I miss her quirkiness, her creativity, our chemistry. 

I miss the way I was when she was in my life, I was excited, optimistic, ready to conquer the world.  She was my muse, my peace, my hope.

With every subtle reminder, every drop of alcohol that lands in the pit of my stomach, every moment alone, I want to plan a comeback.  I can surprise her somehow, maybe write her something from the heart, maybe this post, I mean she used to love my writing. If only I could remind her I used to mean as much to her as she me.

But what’s the point?  Maybe we can reconnect for a couple weeks, a few months, even a handful of days and while I would treasure every minute…it’d still be temporary….

I wrote that 2 years ago about someone.  2 months after that, I met someone I could write that  same thing about now.  2 years from now, I can…..well lets not put that in the universe.  As I roll over in an empty bed, I can sell myself on the fact that I’ve already lost the love of my life.  Nostalgia  never remembers the details,  just the feelings.  It’s the same reason people are still wasting their money to see Lauryn Hill perform an album she doesn’t have clearances for, or why Fuller House exists. 

This crossed my mind as I listened to Drake’s “Views“; wondering where was this dope album everyone else was hearing because this sounds like a half hearted sequel to his second best album.  Anyway, listening to Drake wail over tracks about women he wants everything except a relationship from, my main takeaway was; ego is a hell of a drug.  You love, you lose, you move on but ego….ego can’t take it lying down.  A recurring theme on Views, is the idea of loyalty, and Drake, like most niggas, wants stability and security of a relationship but without the whole commitment thing.  He’s not even talking about winning them back, doing better, it’s just blatant manipulation and guilt tripping because how dare they not take the raincheck of love he’s offering. Drake’s whole steez is finding women starving enough that his crumbs look like Thanksgiving.  He could have them if he so chose (because he actually wants someone he deems an equal); he merely wants them to never be over him. (Because a stripper should be grateful he is treating her like a human).  That is megalomania.  Over calypso beats. (Or as I call it Drakeggaeton)

Listening to Views and being so put off, I then had to look at the man in the mirror.   I’ve definitely used the “let’s just be friends” to carry on a one sided open relationship.  I’ve sabotaged ex’s new relationships, I may have literally quoted Hotline Bling to an ex (facetiously).  I’ve taken it personal when women decided they just can’t with me, when in reality one of us needed to pull off that band aid.  (Not like anyone goes anywhere when I do it anyway…but whatever I’LL be the bad guy).  Bringing it full circle, lately I find myself missing someone who frankly, doesn’t deserve me.  The temptation arises to try and fix things, tell myself its closure, tell myself I thought we were friends…but really her presence in my life would serve as nothing more than ego feeding.  Ego is a hell of a drug.

The way this life account is set up, you only get one.  You only need one.  Unless you bout #thatlife. I’m not. Looks exhausting.  As annoying as dating and searching is, its very convenient to just take oddments of affection from what you know already.   It’s even more convenient to offer it.  I can have my ego stroked by a bunch of maybes or be fulfilled having my one.  Perhaps a mix of both except Tequila might cut someone.  I’ll take the former.

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… DISTRACTION

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Right now I’m writing this, dinner is in the oven, I have a drink that Brady is determined to spill, so I have to keep throwing his ball in the opposite direction, I’m having multiple text conversations, awaiting my turn in Words With Friends and Trivia Crack,  the TV is on ESPN game but muted because I’m listening to The Internet’s “Just Saying/I Tried” on the stereo.  (Somewhere in America, National Grid is still twerking).  I’m able to multitask,  I do so from the time I wake up, I do so at work, and now that I’m home.  This isn’t anything special, we all multitask,  its simply inefficient to focus on one thing and solely that one thing at a time.  Except apparently, when there’s a story about black people being killed or harassed….then you must enter activist mode and remain there indefinitely, stay woke B.  It’s perhaps one of the things that annoys me the most on Facebook outside of my grandparents having conversations under 4 year old pictures and seeing friends from college share memes from whatever Right Wing nonsense page, every day somebody’s cousin makes a meme about a tragedy in black America and something else that we are being distracted by. 

This week, its the tragic MURDER of Sandra Bland and the rap “beef” between Meek Mill and Drake.  Now, on Twitter I gave my thoughts on both matters.  My heart broke watching that dashcam video, I’ve spoken before about a time I got sassy with an officer, and I think about times even my sisters had.  We’re human we have emotions, we react, and it’s terrifying to think one of us could lose our lives if we dare show them.  I also believe Bland was murdered; there’s no way a woman over 6 ft tall could physically hang herself with a trash can liner on a wall that’s shorter than her.  Even if you believe that fallacy to be true, you can watch that video and see she had no business being in jail with a $500 bond in the first damn place.   I also opined on the Meek Mill/Drake beef, Meek looks foolish and I think like authors, artists reach a level of prestige and then start to outsource their work.   Speaking on something as ridiculous as that doesn’t take away from my desire for justice for Bland’s family.  I can live tweet an episode of Power it doesn’t make me less aware of Kindra Chapman, an 18 year old girl who also “committed suicide” after spending a night in a holding cell for taking a cell phone.  I’m painfully aware of a lot of things going on and at times it’s just….exhausting, being angry and hurt and afraid every day.  Sometimes I rather just watch Ballers and escape for a few.  And I shouldn’t have to feel guilty about it.  So one of yall go get your cousin with the distraction memes.

What is a distraction is people going off online about how everyone else is turning a blind eye on something they themselves just learned about minutes ago.  Time spent attacking others is a distraction.  It’s like black people aren’t even allowed to compartmentalize, you got to #staywoke incessantly and damn if you want to just make fun of rappers, listen to ratchet music or debate sports.  There’s this expectation to just be “on” all the time and it’s tiring.  Perchance some people are able to shoulder that burden 24/7, I am not.   I’m able to suffer in silence for a little bit, take my mind off and try and enjoy a distraction.  Lord knows there’s only a limited time until there’s an announcement of no charges being filed or someone else is killed. 

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… MEH


So it was a few months back when I heard about Lorde, the 16 year old New Zealand singer, whose EPs were giving life to bougie black America.  I kept making a note to listen to her but always got sidetracked, it happens.  So I’m with a friend when “Royals” comes on the radio she quickly turns it up, “Oh my God, I LOVE LORDE”, as she fixes her scarf, because bougie black women love scarves as well.  I kept hearing of this song but it was the first time I heard THE song…my reaction, meh.  She was not here for it and like most people do, she proceeded to explain the song because apparently to not like something means you simply don’t understand it.  I just thought the minimalist production didn’t work nor did her vocals.  Another friend recommended I listen to the Mayer Hawthorne cover of the song, I liked his rendition as I’m a fan of his in general but then another realization set in that the lyrics are really weak.  Now the song is soaring up the charts and I’m still like…meh.  Now some of you might remember last year when I did a list of the most overrated things, most of which still very much overrated, this go round I’m doing simply the things that simply aren’t as great as people think they are, or things that I used to like but these days…meh.

It’s the remix baby…speaking of Lil Wayne should top this list but he’s fallen so out of favor I won’t even bother to discuss him any further than the completion of this sentence. There.


Instagram-Instagram was all the craze last summer, then the reality set in: People’s lives really aren’t that interesting to post about daily. While Twitter avoided this harsh truth by becoming more of a public forum than simply people tweeting what they are doing, Instagram users really don’t have sh t to post, thus the plethora of #MCM, #WCW and quotes featuring celebrities, because they burned through all their outfits of the day and baby pictures. My posts are few and far between now, if anything it’s my artwork or if I just so happen to be feeling myself that particular day

“Album Drake”– I’ve always been iffy on Drake, he’s obviously talented but usually hit or miss with me. I’ve finally concluded that I can tolerate him on features, where he does a witty 16 and hook and gets the hell out the way, but a whole album complaining about how fame sucks but don’t mock him for it because he’s famous and has more money than you, keep that.

Yoga– Yoga mats are the new stripper pole, but it’s not objectifying because it’s fitness. Now the #creeplife side of me is here for it, go head on and do ya handsprings in a dress and heels because that’s completely practical. But overall, most people aren’t taking it that seriously, namaste deez.

Beards– Men like women. Women like beards. Men grow beards for women they like. Personally, I don’t like how I look with a beard, so beyond a little stubble between haircuts that’s all you’re getting out of me, I’m fly anyway.

3D Movies-3D is visually amazing when done properly. Avatar was a cheesy take on every Cowboy/Native American tale ever written but my God was it stunning to look at. However, most movies aren’t Avatar, they’re regular movies with 1 3D scene so they can charge an extra 6 dollars.

Bacon-I love bacon, I get it on my veggie burger because this is America. As a cult phenomenon it’s completely overdone, bacon t-shirt, bacon wrapped bacon, bacon colognes, it’s like a really long running joke that people don’t realize is over

Scandal and beard…InMEHtion

Scandal- It’s not because the protagonist is the side chick, or is with a white man, or has power, or she can’t deliver 3 lines without lip quivering like she’s been finger blasted. I just don’t like it Sam I Am.

Bitstrips-Someone a year from now will stumble upon this blog and say wtf is a bitstrip. That’s all that needs to be said

“Turn Up”-Can white people start saying this so it can die already. It’s become a birthday wish, a clever euphemism for “I’m drunk” or Kevin Hart’s go to phrase when he’s clearly bombing at a live event…speaking of

Kevin Hart– He woefully needs a new act. Comedians tend to blow up and go stale (Hi Katt Williams) when they are overexposed and unable to work in new material, “Let Me Explain” was fuggin terrible and even the biggest Kevin Hart stans need to admit that

Beats By Dre– Dr Dre convinced the world they needed studio quality headphones for their smartphones, can’t knock the hustle

Honorable Mentions: Lady Gaga, Cable TV, Clubs, online dating, Network dramas having 22 episode seasons, #blacktwitter, iPhones, Marshall Mathers LP 2, Family Guy

Agree/disagree, love/hate….lemme hear it

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… STAN

Feel like this post is probably going to rub people the wrong way…..Sorry.

So on one of my rare visits to Facebook, I see a friend posts a video to Britney Spears new video, with the title “Britney’s back…BOW DOWN BITCHES”.  So I see some Beyonce fans not take to kindly to that and they respond on the status.  The feed gets really heated and I eat my popcorn and scroll.  I actually had popcorn, what were the odds?  I text the friend “I warned you about the swarm of them killa Beys lol”. She turns on me, “don’t you start defending that shoplifters belly having ass bitch”.  Me and her have had this debate in the past, I’m not necessarily a Beyonce stan, hell a fan even, but speaking talent wise Britney doesn’t even hold a candle.  When me and her had those back and forths it was always friendly fire, no love lost.  Although I was right, I knew to leave it alone after a while. Besides, you don’t win with stans. Ever.  They turn up their emotions to levels unknown and I’m just not prepared to go to that level for a celebrity crush, that’s how you end up with grays in your beard and receding hairlines.  Stans are something else, yo.

I’m a passionate guy, but I can’t say I stan for anything.  Stans are wired differently, I’m more of a spirited debater who comes armed with facts.  I’m a huge Kanye West fan, I’ll defend any album in his catalog but I’m not going to defend leather skirts and temper tanturms because high fashion won’t let him be great.  I think Tom Brady is the best QB in football ( > Peyton) but he underthrew Wes Welker in the Super Bowl.  Of course, even said debates would have to be brought up to me, I’m not searching Twitter and Youtube for opposite opinions just to argue, I like what I like, I think what I think, you’re free to be wrong on your own.  I’m not a missionary. 

Those are probably the worst stans, the ones who try to convert you on some Jehovah Twitnesses steez.  The perfect example are Scandal stans, Standals, Gladiators or whatever else they called who swear Olivia is the pope.  “Dessiner” suggested I watch, I was like “..nah.” she welped and we moved on.  That’s why she’s awesome”.  A friend from work made same inquiry, it became a long drawn out conversation that went from me not finding a TV show appealing to being a man who cant support a show that has a woman lead, interracial couple, and that I can’t keep up with what I personally see is a very dumbed down “political” storyline. K.

Stans are loyal, devoted, forgiving, you’d think they’d be perfect mates, right?  If she can forgive Chris Brown and pretend he can rap, there’s hope for the common man right? Noap.  Stans are also irrational, overly emotional, and clearly possessive.  Most of the people I know who stan male or female are single and fill that void with *drumroll* stanning in the first place. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying things, but there’s something isnt right with investing time and energy into something that isn’t truly yours.  Allow me to correct myself, I stan for Stan. My writing, my art, my brand, my career…I will defend any post to the death (okay i’m lying some of these are….w.e). If stans put as much energy in themselves as they do defending Drake’s wack ass album, who knows where they’d be. 

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… SUPER

Seriously why isn’t the day after Superbowl a holiday?  I’ll take Super Monday and give back Columbus Day, all he did was enslave a nation by accident.  How about we just move President’s Day up, kids don’t need a February break, pray for snow days.  Hell I live in Boston where we managed to make St. Patrick’s Day a holiday and we get a three day weekend in June for reasons no one quite understands, I’m sure we can pull this off. (Okay I do know the significance of Bunker Hill Day but still doesn’t mean the holiday isn’t bull, they can trade that with Juneteenth which is my birthday so i take it off anyway).  Okay I’m rambling.  So the Baltimore Ravens are the Superbowl champions, congrats to Ravens fans, players, David Simon and the cast of the Wire.   As you know I’m a diehard Patriots fan so I don’t care, though I found myself rooting for the 49ers, as my football allegiances go:

Pats > team with brother under center > team with brother as coach #noharbaugh > 10+ pt underdogs > Anyone against the Chargers or Jets

I like Colin Kaepernick, he’s fearless but not in a Tony Romo/Michael Vick doing too way too much way.  It’d be cool to see them back, where they’ll lose to the Patriots…I hope.

Anyway, the day after the Superbowl is the most unproductive workday besides the opening of March Madness. Why? Because everyone will be talking all about the game, Beyonce, blackouts and retirements oh my?  So with that I leave my final 47 observations (yes 47) about Superbowl 47

47. If the “Harbaugh Bowl” is any indication, I do NOT want Peyton vs Eli.

46. Jacoby Jones or the blackout should’ve been MVP

No. 45

45. Ed Reed looks like Django, think I’ma call him Edjango Reed until he grooms himself

44.Edjango Reed wore a yoga sweatband and dared anyone to say something to him

43. If the Chargers stop the Ravens on a 4th and 29, they dont even make the playoffs

42. I hate the Chargers so much, when they inevitably move to LA i think i’ll hate them more

41. Jacoby Jones been practicing endzone dances for 2 weeks

No. 40

40. Joe Flacco looks like a whiter Drake

39. Drake’s new song is terrible, just thought I throw that in

38. If Destiny’s Child replaced Michelle with Latoya from the original group I’d pay to see them on tour

37.  GoDaddy’s commercial was disgusting

36. I truly hope it snows in NY/NJ for next year’s Superbowl

35. Wish adverstisers and TV shows would stop putting hashtags, we make our own trends

34. The NFL got power to the New Orleans faster than FEMA did

33. Rich people trapped in the Superdome while the middle class watches from home….fitting.

32. Kelly Rowland’s thighs shine bright like a diamond

No. 31

31. I’d go cornball brother for Kat Dennings

30. My new e-crush is a Niners fan maybe I should check on her

29. I’m completely over Jennifer Hudson

28. Thank God this was the first football game I could watch without seeing an ad for “Identity Thief”

27. Oh yeah she’s on Mike and Molly

26. Bridesmaids wasn’t that funny

25. So is The Rock a face or heel in Fast 6?

No. 24

24. The Rock has 3 movies coming out and still the WWE Champion, he’s putting on for the kinda blacks

23. Speaking of kinda blacks, Colin Kaepernick has great resiliency

22. For this to be the “Ray Lewis Superbowl” I didn’t see him do a thing ON the field

21. Anquan Boldin is a man amongst boys

20. Randy Moss is a man amongst boys, but Jim Harbaugh doesn’t think so

19. Whatever happened with that Michael Crabtree sexual assault case

18. Beyonce’s dutty wining brought me all the way back to 2006….good times

17. Jay is going to use Bey shutting down the Super Bowl in a verse

16.  4 million an ad, and there wasn’t anything advertised I would actually buy, maybe the new Budweiser

15. If the Patriots were playing Twitter would be blaming Belichick for the blackout

14. Why pick up Randy Moss if you’re not going to throw to him in end zone situations, its like Tebow all over again

13.  RGIII took his buzz, Ray Lewis took his faith, Tebowmania is really dead

12. How epic does Iron Man 3 look

11. Given the awfulness of Spiderman 3 & X-Men 3, I’ll curb my enthusiasm…slightly

No. 10

10. Kanye West or Jay for next years Halftime Show

9. There were 2-3 songs where Bey completely lost me, I really dont pay enough attention to her musically

8. Superbowl tweets > Superbowl Ads

7. Flacco is going to get paid and regress worse than Drew Brees did

No. 6

6. Me and Ray Rice have a similar build, i need to google his workout regimen

5.  Alicia Keys couldn’t hit that note on Brave but played it off nicely

4. That was horrible play calling by Harbaugh (the red one) at the end…he was Andy Reid-esque

3. I can’t wait to see how NFL Films covers the blackout…RIP Steve Sabol

2. The Sandy Hook chorus…wow.

1. Football is really gone til August *cries Ray Lewis tears*

Football gone…

And with that I close the book on another NFL season, but seriously what the hell am I supposed to do on Sundays?  I really think its time for a girlfriend.

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… WOMEN

I remember there was this one girl from around the way. She had a big booty so i’ll call her big booty. I had got to her first, she liked me and while we wasn’t dating most of the block knew she was mine. Or so I thought, constantly she would call and tell me stories about how one my friends tried to get at her. One even acted like he didn’t even know me smh. I wasn’t tripping however, we wasn’t a couple, if she wanted someone else it was what it was.  Also I didn’t like her too much; she was dumb, like really dumb, like I had to check her ID to make sure she wasn’t secretly 11 years old or something.  Besides that in this day and age dudes don’t fight over women, a basic male will scrap over sneakers, phones and rappers but a woman, not unless she’s Rihanna.  Or defending her honor but that’s another post entirely.  Women have grown a lot more territorial these days.  They will fight for what’s theirs or proceed and take from another.  While men have collectively agreed to not stress, women are at each other’s throat.  They used to play so nicely; what happened?

Friends- If a girl has no other female friends, I will feel some type of way about her.  There has to be some character flaw if no one who doesn’t want to have sex with you seems to like your ass. Yet all girls seem to go through the I don’t talk to females phase, they all want to be the first lady in a group on dudes, it’s Eve syndrome.  Their reasoning is always the same, they gossip, cause drama etc but newsflash, dudes are probably worse than females these days.  Unless they’re blood or sorors, you rarely see women together anymore.

Relationships- I’m way into Thursday Night Football to follow but from what I heard,”Scandal”, my imaginary girlfriend Kerry Washington stars as the President’s sidepiece, but his wife is a b**** so its perfectly acceptable.  Women don’t respect relationships if they dont respect both parties; for example “She” rubbed a lot of women the wrong way.  She was rude to just about any female not blood related to the point I probably could’ve cheated off the strength they hated her.  They had no respect for her or the relationship (however i did so i elected not to pick any forbidden fruit).

The Trife is real

Sex- Men always knew women loved sex as much as we did , but it was a hidden secret.  These days women are a lot more open about their sexuality, what was taboo is the standard, and is it me or are 3/5 chicks bi curious now?  The mantra is what you wont do, the next will. Some women will be damned if someone else comes and does what they don’t like anyway but its the principality.  Women are pretty much outdoing each other the men are merely practice dummies.

Competition- When I was dating “Madame” she was jealous of my friend, my friend was also jealous of her. They didn’t know each other but didn’t like each other (ironically enough they would later go to school together become cool and have no idea how much they “hated” each other #itsasmallworldafterall).  Even today, every girl I’m talking to don’t think much of every girl I’m talking to.  Apparently I have bad taste, aside from them of course.  They all have names for them, “my groupies”, “my herd”, “my victims”, “my bimbos”, and “them other bishes”.  Perhaps its overconfidence, perhaps its just lack of respect for my standards.

Haaaaadouken.

Empathy- We live in a world where baby mothers being stomped on camera, bus patrons are being uppercutted on camera and intimate pictures and videos being leaked are the norm.  Its a “welp, its not me” mentality that seems to resonate throughout.  I’m not acting like I’m the most compassionate guy in the world but its odd to see women say “Evelyn Lozada had it coming”.

Now I’m not saying all women are like this, there’s binders full of exceptions (who likely read this post with the sourest face).  But for the most part women have lost respect for one another.  There is no battle of the sexes, men can just kick back and watch women fight each other.  Baby mother vs Girlfriend, Ex vs New Girl, Sidechick vs Wife, the battles just wage on.  I guess as a man I shouldn’t care, we fought for years over women, maybe its just their turn.

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… COMPATIBILITY

I have an e-crush.  She’s smart, funny, the right mix of reserved and freak, loves sports, into fitness, likes the same music, hell she even draws. She’s basically a much prettier version of me.  Hopefully our paths cross, and when they do she’s still single, I’m surprised she even is now.  On paper she’s everything a dude would want, or maybe I’m just so vain that I would swoon over someone who’s like me.   Compatibility has never really been a big deal to me in a relationship but meeting someone who is definitely piques my interest.  Perhaps it’s a quality I’ve overlooked all this time, common interests make for better conversations and dates but how about a better relationship? How important is compatibility if there’s at least strong chemistry?

So let’s take my three favorite recurring characters, “She”, “Her” and “Miss”. My longest relationship, my strongest chemistry, and my most compatible. Now “She” and “Her” don’t have much in common with me (now I think about it, they are actually a lot alike despite the fact they despise each other, and for the record it’s only like 37% about me).   “She” and I were polar opposites. She’s younger but really old school, she hates most music, movies and TV today.  While I shared some of her sentiments, I’d listen to a Drake song despite her eye rolls.  There was also plenty of times I would want to watch CNN or a documentary and she would basically be looking at it like a bored student. I spoke before on how my new healthy lifestyle caused issues, she’s the type to drive to the corner store and now I was asking her to take a hike with me.  However it worked with a little give and take.  I could manage to sit through an episode of Jerseylicious, and she eventually introduced her iPod to Kanye West.  I learned how to explain things without sounding like a tool, she grew to like egg whites and turkey sausage.   Over time, we understood our differences and focused on our similarities and balanced each other out.  “She” and I had many issues, compatibility wasn’t one.

When the sweet girl you just met becomes you’re girlfriend

 

Now with “Her”, we were so different but you probably couldn’t tell because we were just that into each other.  I’m a homebody, she’s always out.  I’m a (self proclaimed) sports guru, she couldn’t name any athlete she wasn’t overly attracted to.  She always wanted to discuss things then and there, while I rather wait and let tensions die down.  I was sarcastic, she was sensitive.  Over time however, the chemistry died and our differences stood out more.  The cute girl I had a thing for was now my girlfriend, she had wants and needs and I wasn’t always able to comply with them all.  I was now a boyfriend who didn’t share her interests, didn’t make enough time for her, never let her play in any reindeer games.  When we were getting along it was magical, when we weren’t we couldn’t stand each other.  Compatibility again wasn’t a problem in the relationship but we needed something, anything more than mere chemistry and we never could find it.

Now “Miss”, we have a lot in common.  We could talk about anything, we still do sometimes.  Meeting her was almost like a breath of fresh air, she simply got me.  I understood her as well, and again on paper it seems like a match made, yet it just never worked out that way.  There’s compatibility but not as much chemistry.  As an introvert, I’m really big on vibes and signals, and I never felt much chemistry, at least from her end.  My crush is seemingly perfect for me but compatibility only gets so far, is there truly chemistry?Who knows? What if there isn’t? Perhaps she’s better off just a crush, keep the fantasy alive.  So I guess to answer my own question, compatibility is a plus but it’s not nearly enough to build a relationship on. Regardless of what online dating services would like you to believe.  Pewn Pewn Shots fired.

-Stan-

 

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