Tag Archives: Donald trump

Today’s Word is… FIRED

7/6/17 (Day 240)- I love this country, I harshly judge this country… Thats kinda how the whole black in America thing works. I think about the times when I personally was ashamed to be an American, I can think of 3 off top; Katrina, Sandy Hook and this.  When I wasn’t just angry at my government but I actually felt the shame, I thought about how other nations probably viewed us.  Treating own citizens like refugees? Kids killed and not a single push on gun control? And then, there’s this orange duckfacing reality star who was chosen to run the whole country.   Looking at clips of Toupee Fiasco at the G20 summit, speaking to other nations about his beef with a cable news network, having to literally be babysat during his sit down with Putin because he can’t be trusted with, you know, words. It’s actually reached the point of shame.  This actually happened, he’s the 45th president of the United States, forever.  The embarrassing high school picture of American history.  Just as you look at those colored contacts and 5X tee shirts and wonder what the hell you were thinking, that’s how I will always remember 2016.  Even after history inevitably whitewashes this and blames Russia for everything. YOU did this, America. YOU did.  

7/11/17 (Day 245)- These are my confessions, I’ve never actually seen the Godfather I just get the pop culture references and fake my way through.  If Mango Mussolini can fake his way through the Presidency, surely I can fake my way through this analogy.  So in The Godfather, when Vito almost gets killed or something and then James Caan does get killed as acting mob boss, Vito picks his youngest son, Scarface to take over instead of Fredo who would’ve been next in line.  Because you can’t give Fredo too much power, he’d Fredo it up.  So when news broke that Donald Trump Jr, the Fredo of this family of Fredos met with a Russian lawyer to get dirt in Hillary Clinton complete with email chain, I thought wow, he really IS Fredo.  So what does Fredo do? He doubles down on the Fredoness by tweeting the emails out without any idea of if and how this can blow up in his face.  In Godfather II, Fredo tries to take out Al Pacino, fails and gets dealt with.  Because of course he did, he’s Fredo. Meanwhile, Twitter Fingers Sr has yet to chime in.  Because, it’s Fredo.  

7/15/17 (Day 249)- To commit an act of treason, one must aid a country we are at war with.  The United States and Russia are not at war, but relations between the two countries have been on “I just don’t like this bitch” forever.  So… its technically treason but not treason.  Diet Treason. Treason Lite.  Apparently, that’s close but no cigar because Congress is acting like none of this is happening and back to the business of replacing Obamacare with Get Rich of Try Dying. They’ve accepted Orange Foolius for what he is, a distraction so while people wonder colluding with a foreign government to alter the results of an election isn’t a crime, they continue to work in the shadows. You look up and realize Dolt45 hasn’t actually done anything of note since taking office but golf and tweet.  A cheeto dust smokescreen. 

7/21/17 (Day 255)- Considering it’s his catchphrase, Nacho Nazi isn’t good at firing people.  Instead he just hires your replacement and hopes your pride makes you quit.  I mean, it works for his wives.  The latest victim, Sean Spicer.  I can’t say I’d miss Spicey, but I’m sure Melissa McCarthy is broken up over this… This impression did more for her career than Mike and Molly ever did.  I’ll miss the countless countless lies, the memes, and maybe this means that Press Briefings will air like again because that whole cameraless thing was very troubling.   Enter Anthony Scaramucci, who is what I think Trump thinks he looks like.  Sure he’s from Goldman Sachs, supported Obama and calls himself the Mooch… Consistently doesn’t matter, that’s pretty par for the course. The issue isn’t that Persimmon Putin needs a better communication team, it’s the actual bullshit being communicated.  Like lying about the Inauguration crowd like we don’t have, cameras.  Lies to cover up a lie that was a lie about another lie.  Why not just hire Joe Budden?

7/24/17 (Day 258)- This is the bill that never dies, yes it goes on and on my guys, Senators tried to vote on it not knowing what it was, they’ll just keep supporting it forever just because this the bill that… They are really adament about ripping healthcare from poor people.  They even rushed John McCain out of cancer recovery just to make sure broke people won’t be able to in the future.  They are if nothing else, persistent. Meanwhile Sunkist Stalin, finally defends Fredo by mentioning Hillary’s “acid washed” emails. (Literally not a thing).  He really cares about those emails… Maybe that’s why he colluded with Russia to get them. 

7/25/17 (Day 259)- So Trumpcare 3.0 aka Wealthcare aka Get Rich or Try Dying is dead. I think. For now.  Sure it’ll be back tho. Like herpes. Shoutout to Usher.  The biggest plot twist was that the deciding FOH vote came from John McCain.  After someone may have said God need to call his ass home already. Allegedly.  Let’s not get carried away here, if you pull a gun on someone, decide not to fire you then don’t get to say you saved their life. Which is pretty much what happened there.  But good looks John, and you know beat cancer.  So yet another L for Donallllllld, I thought deals were his thing. *sips tea*

7/26/17 (Day 260)- Still nursing the L he caught yesterday, Darth Cheeto decided to tweet out a ban on transgendered people in the military.  Because fuck you, that’s why.  His lists the reason as being cost, but in reality he’d save the country more money by actually paying his taxes.  It’s simply discrimination for the sake of doing so.  This wasn’t some hard decision, there’s no remorse, he tweeted it with the same regard as I would tweet what I had for breakfast.  Let me know when the military officials themselves challenge this tho. *sips more tea* Bleh. It’s cold. 

7/31/17 (Day 265)- Moooooch, we hardly knew ye. I mean imagine missing the birth of your child and losing your wife for a job you “held” for 10 days.  You ain’t even get a badge yet, a .gov email address, can’t even update your LinkedIn page, ain’t even get fired on your day off because you haven’t even got PTO yet, I was an engineering major (12 days) longer than he was employed (bout 10).  Milk and plantain had longer shelf lives. Good laugh indeed. See you in a few Scaramuccis.  

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… SUPERCALLOUSMISOGYNISTICRACISTNAZIPOTUS

So first, I’m sure that is and will be the longest word in the history of SFW.  And second, I swore I was going to take a Trump break but well, it’s been a long week.  This….is…the…remix.  

           

1/22/17 (Day 75) – So I read the inauguration speech, because the sound of Mango Mousellini’s voice makes me want to jump out of a window.  I didn’t expect much, but I found myself shocked how blatantly divisive it was.  There was little to no message about coming together, it was a rally cry for all of his supporters. As millions protested his inauguration  (some of which voted for him), Toupee Fiasco sits upon his throne with no incentive to win them over, he’s already secured a 4 year bye. (So he thinks). 

The black President was never afforded such luxury.  Not that he even wanted to.
Every word hyper analyzed, Obama was tasked with palliating white fear that he would be the BLACK President, appealing to his base only.  The revolution has been televised. Black people can barely enjoy February, BET, Black Girls are Magic without first swimming across a lake of white tears as they complain about exclusion.  What little we have, we are expected to share, as the new President of the United States openly gloats about how he and his supporters have successfully deboed the country back and it’s normalized. This country is conditioned to fear the black revolutionary; a black Trump couldn’t exist.  Not even a black Bernie. The black president will always have to hold white people’s hands and tell them he won’t abandon them.  The orange one…he just points to the electoral map like a #Scoreboardt.  

1/25/17 (Day 78)- Richard Spencer got punched again. The New Edition Movie has been a pleasant distraction from a lot of the nonsense.  It’s the little things. 

1/27/17 (Day 80)- You know how they say the pen is mightier than the sword? Persimmon Putin has shown how mighty it can be as he’s made white supremacy go platinum in its first week. 2001 Islamophobia is back with a vengence and he didnt even need to buy a 9/11 with his trap money.  He enacted a muslim ban, because he could.  Lord help us all if theres an actual attack and the country is in a panic.

I weep for the bill, sitting on Capitol Hill, as the Supercallousmisogynisticracistnazipotus seems to have decided that even with a fully supported Congress he can just rule via executive orders. Congress argued against Obama’s use of EOs, but allow Trump to cook because if and when it blows up they can say they didn’t do it. Cowards.

1/29/17 (Day 82)- One of the biggest struggles of being a black man in America is the duality of having privilege and being oppressed at the same time. So far, Trump has gone after women, Mexicans, immigrants but has yet to do anything specifically to ME, but I remain in constant fear that time will be up soon enough.  So I find myself looking upon the wreckage and can’t help but see the irony in seeing the world react to everyone being treated like black people. 

From slavery, Jim Crow, redlining, prison industrial complex, war on drugs, student debt, underemployment,  gentrificiation…this country has been legally attacking us for generations only to be responded to with gaslighting.  “I didn’t own slaves”, “we elected a black president”, “racism is a dated concept”.  Even our own bought into the rhetoric using black on black crime and respectability politics to rationalize an undeserved war waged against us.  

But….this isn’t about me. Yet.  Edward Littlehands is distracted for the moment going after refugees. A country “founded” on religious freedom and Give Me Your Tired… is turning innocent people away because they believe that they may turn on the America who by the way are bombing the fuck out of them.   It’s being sold as a precautionary measure but Boston Marathon bombers? Russian.  Dylan Roof?  All American boy. Automatic rifles? Still able to be purchased by civilians. So tell me more how blocking immigrants is keeping us safe?

Terror isn’t a religion or a skin color.  It isn’t even something you can actually wage war against.  You can make it into whatever you want it to be and then attack that (you know like “drugs”)  

1/30/17 (Day 83)- I don’t care what your politics are…if you think this would be the first 10 days under Hillary you’re insane.  That is all.

-Stan-

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