Tag Archives: dedication 4

Today’s Word is… HATER

My favorite job ever was when I was 17.  I got a job at Target working the electronics department.  The hours sucked, the pay was terrible, and I didn’t like most of my coworkers.  What I enjoyed however, was customer questions, especially on music. In a way, it was like having my own record store, an early dream of mine back when people actually bought media.   I probably would’ve been fired had they known about the purchases I dissuaded customers from making, not like I got commission, “the product sells itself…” pssh whatever.  I developed a nice following of customers for my opinion and had I known better I probably would’ve started a blog or something back then.  These days I’m just as opinionated, but it’s hard to have one these days, now we live in the hater era; where everyone’s opinion that isn’t your own, is merely hating because you’re never wrong.  It’s a hilarious attack on accountability, rappers use haters to mask the fact they aren’t making quality music, regular people use it because…well I don’t know.  You put something out there but expect no one to have an opinion on it how does that work?

Men Lie. Women Lie. Numbers Don’t.

The fundmental difference between hating and opinion is really the validity of your opinion.  If you’re talking nonsense you just sound bitter.  I dislike Kobe Bryant but to say he isnt one of the greatest players of the modern era, is so irrational it can’t be nothing but hating.  When CNN projected Barack Obama as the winner of the election, I instantly turned to Fox News just to see what they would say.  Of course, there was Karl Rove saying it isn’t over when the crowd already stormed the court.  You lost by 10 but you really arguing if the halfcourt buzzer beater counted, you sound ridiculous.  Then again betting 100 million dollars on the wrong horse  would drive anyone mad.

The other is the relationship of the opinionated, something far too many people get confused over.  It wasn’t long ago Lil’ Wayne released his Dedication 4 mixtape.  I downloaded it, listened to it, wasn’t impressed.  I tweeted my opinion and here came an onslaught of Weezy fans calling me a hater and telling me he has more money (really? that’s your argument?). Now while I can’t go into a studio and do what Lil Wayne does (too be honest maybe I could but thats beside the point), I’m a music consumer.  Tell me more how music consumers have no right to give an opinion on music.  Hating would be talking about how many downloads the mixtape got, or why women sweat him even though he looks like a shrunken head, I merely kept my opinion on what I’m qualified to, the music.  But artists like Wayne don’t have accountability, the audience is wrong and jealous of him.  He’ll learn eventually when people stop supporting, ask 50 cent.

The third qualification of a hater is an unsolicited opinion.  You can’t post a picture and call someone a hater for not liking it.  Perhaps they could’ve kept it to themselves but so could you. Yet you put it out there to be judged.   We constantly talk about our lives (looks into mirror) and then feel some type of way if someone comments on it.  I love when readers disagree with my post, call me out on something or tell me I had spelling mistakes.  They have no reason to hate, I’m not that serious.  Opinions can be good or bad, you got to learn to accept both.  But every athlete, musician and actor brushes it off as hate, why can’t I?

Goal for 2013…run marathon, get this watch..okay maybe 2014

It goes without saying, we like to mimic stars. I remember when I first heard Jay name drop Hublot watches in a song, I made decent money maybe I can get me a Hublot…I saw the price, my feelings were hurt. Badly.  We can’t always have what stars have. With fame, hate is just part of the territory.  With ordinary people despite having nothing otherworldly to covet, they pretend they have that same amount of hate. As I said before, haters are usually wrong and/or have no reason to comment other than to hear themselves speak.  You look at the reasons claim they have haters they are silly.  No one is hating on your relationship, they are just tired of reading statuses about him.  We aren’t losing sleep over your follower count, you just aren’t that funny.  It’s not you don’t have a nice body but do you even know how to take a head shot?  It’s just a lack of accountability.  Or maybe I’m just hating because I don’t got any haters. Haters gon’ hate.



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Today’s word is… INTIMIDATION

“I Ain’t Scared of You Motherf***as” -The Late Great Bernie Mac

So I’m on the train nodding out to this frustratingly average Dedication 4 mixtape and I notice someone staring at me.  I glance at my observer….caramel skinned, one of them flowy dresses that probably has a name but I don’t know because I’m a man, straight black hair, pretty face with just the right amount make up, not bad.  I smile at her, she smiles back, she has 3 rows of teeth.  -__- I see the rows moving I think she’s talking to me, she says “hey Tristan, been a while”.  A lightbulb goes off finally, I know her, she was jaggermouth or sabertooth something like that #kidsarecruel.  I think we were talking at some point too.  She didn’t dress as well and her hair wasn’t as up kept back then, she was somebody’s sister, cousin or homegirl and I simply was the wingman when we met.

Thinking about it now, I was always somebody’s wing man before I even knew of the word.  I was the always the one to talk up the homegirl, the bad built cousin, or the flat out mean ones.  Ironically enough, because I knew I had no expectations outside of keeping her busy, I was a lot more confident than I otherwise would be.  Then on my own pursuits, scared to death, scared to look, I’m shook. I counted myself out a lot, I was always willing to be the decoy because I didn’t think I was worthy of the actual target.  Part of that is just being introverted; I sit back and assess the situation, weigh the odds, and act accordingly depending on my comfort level.  Simply put; going for what’s easier.

Over time, I grew out of that phase and started to challenge myself pursue women who you would think wouldn’t be interested; more successful, extremely more attractive, older…and the results was no different from the girls I was chasing on back in the day.  Give or take a few who were just too full of themselves they are probably writing Strawberry Letters to Steve Harvey asking why can’t they find a man, these “intimidating”, unapproachable, out of my league women want nothing different from any other woman.  In fact, they were actually intimidated by me for some reason.

Myself, I’m probably as un-intimidating as you can get, like Michael Strahan on a daytime talk Show.  I’m cute but not unbelievably handsome, I’m not exactly balling out of control, and I don’t exactly have women lined around the corner like *some* would assume.  Speaking of, that’s perhaps the main thing that has come up as of late; competition. However, that’s still not so much me as if it is one woman sizing herself up to another. I ain’t sh*t. Honestly.  But alas the difference between men and women, intimidating women apparently don’t need a man, intimidating men apparently got enough women so they are conveniently bypassed and admired from afar.  If only if these “intimidating” men and women would find each other, it would work out surely, right?  Well I tried that. Her name was “Ms.”.


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