Tag Archives: cuffing season

Today’s Word is… CUFFIN’

The cuffing season phenomenon is interesting to see in real time. After spending the whole summer pretending to be savages, it’s now time to settle down for a few months. Human beings don’t actually have mating seasons, so it’s somewhat of a placebo affect… Colder weather, more time indoors, desire to spend that time with someone. The end of the year has you in a more reflective state, you have that “epiphany” and do a light contact purge because the days are literally shorter and you have to reclaim as much of them as possible. Personally, I always preferred to date in spring/summer because I’m a dater; when the weather is nice I like going out doing things and knowing who my +1 is going to be. I can Netflix and chill by my damn self. (Stop asking me if I’m still watching you know damn well I am). I much rather be single at Thanksgiving than at a wedding. Don’t worry about who I’m seeing, worry about that soggy ass stuffing no one is eating.

But no one listens to me. So they fall for the cuffing season traps; they panic and spend $63 on e harmony only to find out all the men there look like preachers, they book that flight to homecoming to see the same ex they haven’t wanted in a decade, join that beard group on Facebook. Granted, I’ve fallen for it too. I think this time last year I found myself on a date with a white woman who was entirely too into her improv troupe. Then there was the one who lied about her age. And the vegan. Then the “celibate” one. Then I shot my shot at a friend. (it missed, badly) Then the one who said I wasn’t her type but was willing to try this out anyway. and it was obvious that the “cuffing season” got me. (and with the last one it clearly got her too). All in the name of I don’t want to be single anymore. Just trying to be the “good guy” who is about more than wyd and come thru texts. I could’ve just saved time and money just finding other ways to occupy my time. Like working out and watching Westworld.

Love is dope, as are relationships… When they happen organically for the right reasons. You may already find yourself mid cuff and have to ask the hard questions like, do you really like this person or just hate dating? Do they even like you or just hate dating? Do they like pineapple on their pizza? Is there a future here? Or are you just killing time until peak cuffing season after New Years. (studies* show that after new year’s day, suddenly the list goes from 6’+ to “taller than me”, the distance radius goes from 25 mi to I think I prefer long distance relationships, and all pictures get rotated out to snapchat filtered ones)

*There are no studies

Ultimately, the problem with the idea of cuffing season is not dissimilar to moving back home for a bit or taking a job just to be working again. You look up and it’s been 2 years and you’re no closer to moving out because all your money is going to the food and cable. They shop at Whole Foods now. I’ve said before that no one is “ready” for relationships; just as someone who tells you they aren’t ready to date just don’t want your ass, someone who is all about cuffing season wants comfort…not necessarily you. When they want you it won’t matter if it’s Columbus Day, the first day of summer (or mid divorce). So my advice this cuffing season is to ride out the lonely because dead end relationships are never what’s up. Keep your heart, 3 Stacks. They probably snore and hog covers anyway.

-Stan-

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Today’s Word is… CUFFING

[Editor’s Note: Another oldie but goodie, with a few added thoughts, also i think ima just post on Mondays (and maybe Thursday) going forward…enjoy]

Awww n shit

“I don’t wanna be a player no more” – Joe

Cuffing season is upon us.  No BDSM.  For those  who aren’t aware of this phenomena, basically when the weather cools down people who would normally rather be single or promiscuous find themselves desiring to be “cuffed” or tied down by a serious relationship.  

(Yeah I know ita Spring now, also for what its worth spring should be officially “cuffing” season, beautiful days call for outings with beautiful women, rainy days in > snow days, thunder buddies, and if April showers bring May flowers who is going to get said flowers…you ain’t got the answers Sway)

I never been one to pay much attention to said season, for me it’s always cuffing season, I suck at being single.  Ironically enough, I love to date win over new hearts, hit the reset button on all my funny stories but I’m not the single type.  I much rather be in a relationship, and because I haven’t done a list in a while I will do so now

Top 10 reasons why I prefer Relationships

10. Taken Men are way more desired: Something I noticed, women love them some taken men.  Perhaps its wanting what they can’t have or the fact that they actually have another person to size themselves up to but I always get more attention in a relationship than single (not that I take advantage, I’m a loyal dude and whatnot)

9.  Sense of accomplishment: If everyone supposedly is looking for that one, if you are in a stable relationship, aren’t you winning? Some would say otherwise but I’ll happily go out with the team and know I already have pink matter waiting back home, it’s like having a first round bye.

8. Relationship Fraternity: It’s hard to relate to people in relationships when you’re single, it’s like being the only person who hasn’t seen The Dark Knight Rises yet (is it on DVD yet? *sigh*).

(I’ve seen Dark Knight but haven’t seen Captain America, so still *sigh* #blerdlines)

Single person always going to cosign your flawed argument and suggest you leave,  they want you to pledge Single Beta Single.  

7. Get away with soft stuff: Romantic comedies, wearing pastel colors, candles, not going to the bar, all man laws that are okay to be broken when you’re in a relationship.  If I wasn’t sure I could pull a look off, “shorty got it for me” was my foolproof excuse.

It was a gift…

6. Always having +1: The Friday night in scrolling thru your phone struggle is real, it’s nice to always have a date for whatever, networking events, restaurants you want to try, sitting in the crib watching netflix, it’s always better with someone.  

5. Reflection: You learn a lot about yourself in a relationships, things your family may not tell you, your friends may not notice and you’re unwilling to accept about yourself.  Good and bad, relationships help mold you. A good woman knows how to call you on your sh t without being a nag, its a lost art.

4. Consistent Sex: Well, duh

3. Getting better at sex: We talking about practice man, it’s what stops one from becoming the “talks too much guy” or “Mr. licks too fast”, also you teach her like Yeezy.  There’s a comfort when you’re in a relationship than just casually smashing, you can be direct and honest and try things.

2. Perks: Having someone to talk to, someone in your corner, someone to make a sideeye with in awkward conversation, someone to

Perks.

pick up your dry cleaning while their out, a guarenteed Birthday present, there’s plenty of perks that just come with a relationship you don’t even realize until they’re gone

 

 

 

1. Love: The obvious one, being in love.  It’s the ultimate high, being with someone you love and loves you all the same.  You have that extra pep in your step because they kissed you as you left, just hearing their name makes you swoon.  The idea that someone was once a stranger, and now you can’t see yourself without them, it’s the penultimate feeling.

-Stan-

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Filed under Dating, Love, Relationships