Today’s Word is… JUDGE

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Lol.

We all judge.  They say don’t judge a book by its cover but if I see a video vixen holding a gun with bricks of coke in the background titled Trap Lady: I Nu It Was Time; I feel like I know exactly what kinda book that is and its intended audience (#40) Impressions matter, appearances matter, words matter.  There’s a negative connotation that’s always associated with judging, it’s always used to elucidate unfair, prejudiced thought.  Hi Respectability Politics brigade.  The other misconception is that to judge means one thinks they are better.  When I say I judge someone its really to say, “hm I wouldn’t do that” or “I wonder what’s the story is there”.  As an INFJ (#37*), I observe, I wonder, I theorize.  My “judgement” is moreso rooted in curiosity.  Just the other day, I ordered a veggie burger with real bacon, the cook probably judged me, but he’s considerably older than me with a mohawk, so I’m judging him (#46*).  (But for real its like he’s Jordan bald and then this crimpy strip of hair or its actually braided, like who is braiding this inch wide strip of hair routinely….you don’t have the answers Sway.  I judge people every day, sorry Tupac I’m inquisitive.  I can’t help but wonder why some people say and do things.  There’s probably a valid reason for all (25? 100?…eh I’ll do 50) of these things (okay some are inexcusable) but hey, ima judge anyway.  Cuz only God can judge me.  Boom. Flipped that.

50) Mets fans (this includes my father)
49) People who wear pajamas in public
48) Men on the subway who dont at least offer their seat to a woman
47) People who purchased a Wii U
46) Grown men with mohawks

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#45

45) Owners of selfie sticks
44) 2015 Blackberry Owners
43) Paid Journalists who just post screenshots of tweets
42) Chitterlings eaters
41.5) People who didn’t know that’s the proper spelling of “chitlins”
41) Dudes at the kickback who take pictures holding bottles they didn’t buy
40) Self published Literatcheture Authors who never edited their work
39) Parents who bought their kids heelys
38) People with “backup” Instagrams
37) People who qualify statements with personality types or astrological sign
36) I love Makonnen fans

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36.)This isnt I Love Makonnen...or is it

35. People who go to Hookah bars
34. Grown men with cornrows
33. Women who don’t want their man to watch adult entertainment
32. People who don’t eat fried chicken (this includes my beloved Reine)
31. Men who don’t like any sports
30. People who lose 10 lbs and start selling Herbalife
29. Black people who strictly listen to hip hop only
28. Bougie black people who think they’re “ironically ratchet”
27. Pedestrians who press the light even when you was letting they ass cross
26. Raider fans
25. Black men without facial hair not named Barack Obama
24. Anyone who still uses hotmail (again, my own father)
23. Men who do suspect things to “mock” women

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#23

22. Women who follow Joe Budden
21. People who don’t have a favorite Michael Jackson song
20. People who cheat in Words With Friends
19. Dating advice gurus
18. Anyone who liked Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor
17. Big girls who fail to see the irony in casting aspersions on smaller women
16. Parents who take their kids to school without hats and gloves
15. Whoever be making fake deep memes comparing Jordans to slavery
14. People who celebrate month “anniversaries”
13. Lil Boosie

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12. Dudes who don’t even think about washing their hands in the bathroom
11. Able bodied people who take the elevator in the gym
10. Women who comment on BallerAlert
9. People who say “natural hair isn’t for everybody”
8. Men who won’t let their hairline rest in peace

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Let it go, let it goooo

7. Women who wear waist trainers
6. Bill Cosby conspiracy theorists
5. Black men who just log on Twitter to talk down on black women
4. People who leak nudes
3. Poor black conservatives
2. Homophobes
1. Deadbeat parents

Honorable mentions: 
People who get tattooed by amateurs, People who want to know why there isn’t a White History Month
Dudes who send unsolicited dicktures, People who make gofundme’s for selfish causes
Anyone who still rocks Girbaud jeans

-Stan-

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4 Comments

Filed under Randomness, Simply Stan

4 responses to “Today’s Word is… JUDGE

  1. “40) Self-published Literatcheture Authors who never edited their work”

    I severely judge people who do this. I once read a book (close but not quite literatcheture) by an author who wrote the entire book in passive voice in addition to numerous spelling errors. I had to get on the struggle bus to finish it.

  2. 30. People who lose 10 lbs and start selling Herbalife

    18. Anyone who liked Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor

    Basically. LOL.

  3. That list is hilarious! I’m so glad I found your blog. I’m currently binge reading all your posts. Judge away.

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