Today’s Word is… SIMILARITIES

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My favorite thing about social media is that no matter where you are or what you’re doing, there’s someone else.  I can tweet who’s up at 2 am and get a response,  I can live tweet anything on TV and click the hash tag and find someone else discussing.  We’re not so different you and I.  So if we’re so alike why front like you’re not just as weird a person as I am on occasion? Just I know I’m not the only one who laughs at awkward moments, thinks Stevie Wonder ain’t blind or reads random Wikipedia articles for no reason.  Or just read “I’m Not the Only One” in a singing voice.   

Or….

– Thinks of a random list when they can’t think of a better topic

– Will mute the TV while they are writing

– Hit a random time on the microwave and take it out before the timer hits 0

– Then when there’s a cold spot just eat around it because you don’t wanna walk back

– Wanted to give a bad Uber review but then remembered this stranger has your home address now

– Gets offended when the cashier uses that pen on your money so when you get change you hold it up to the light in front of them

– Shares your own Instagram picture on Twitter because you didn’t get that 11th like yet

– Hear any phone ringing and check mine even if the ringtone is nothing close to mine

– Use “hakuna mutata” in everyday conversation

– Still doesn’t quite understand Pinterest and doesn’t care to learn

– Ordering out after going grocery shopping because after putting everything away you don’t feel like cooking

– Will dress from the bag days after doing laundry

– Wouldn’t watch half of the shows you watch if not for live tweeting

– Send old pictures they haven’t seen when you don’t feel like taking a new one

– Refuse to say bless you after the 2nd sneeze

– Will leave emojis on a picture instead of liking because you don’t want your thirst showing in the following tab

– Seeing an option for a coupon code in an online checkout and spending 15 minutes looking for one

– Always browsing on Incognito mode but hate having to log into social media

– Text who’s this when you know you still have the number

– Use increasingly bigger words in an argument and then mock them because they don’t even know what you’re talking about

– Make up cover stories in your head in case you run into someone you know while you’re out by yourself

– Rather text than call because you don’t want to stop listening to music

– Email/Call out of work at like 4am so they can’t respond

-Sees no reason to put pizza on a plate

– Will leave a website forthwith if the article is just a slideshow

– Act like a secret agent when you’re trying to take a selfie in public

– Always losing your phone because its on silent 95% of the time

– Only knows like 3 drinks to order at the bar

Or maybe you’re not like me at all.  I just hope you knows that this then makes you ISIS.   That is all

-Stan-

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2 Comments

Filed under Randomness, Simply Stan

2 responses to “Today’s Word is… SIMILARITIES

  1. Agnes

    HA! You’re funny.

  2. I think we’re the same person lol

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