Today’s Word is… FALLING

I guess this is a sequel? Meh, sequels never live up to the hype.  Remix? No, those suck too.  Okay, a new post that’s closely related to an old one? Yeah, let’s call it that.  I told you before I was in love 4 1/2 times. Well we can safely bring it down to 4 now. I say that because that 1/2 upon further review, the call’s been overturned, I will not be charged a timeout.  At that time, I was falling in love, at least I thought I was, if you’ve been reading for a while you know how that all worked out.  Falling in love is somewhat of a different monster than the actual feeling of love.  To again quote Love Jones “falling in love ain’t sh t”.  We’re attracted to who we are attracted to, we share things with that person, we develop a bond and suddenly you find yourself really wondering why you’re smiling like a fool whenever you hear from them, why they plague every free thought, and most importantly why they scare the living hell out you. 

Falling in love is scary for multiple reasons. For starters, you know what’s going on in your mind but never theirs.  You tread lightly, because no one wants to put themselves out there and realize they are on an one way street.  It’s hard to be falling for someone and know they don’t quite feel the same way.  You can try to grin and bear it, but ultimately resentment will grow.  You were there for the same moments and conversations I were and you really aren’t feeling me?  Profess feelings and you just going to shrug and say why not, like I’m just sending a friend request?  Even the most mature person can’t play themselves to that extent.  At that point and you just need to get as far away as possible.  At least for a while, maybe it’s selfish but we all need to be sometimes. I’ve surely been on both sides of that coin. 

Falling in love is scary because now that you found love in a hopeless place, what’s supposed to happen?  Are you ready for a relationship?  Are they?  If not, why say anything? “I think I’m falling for you but I’m not looking to be with you right now”, you probably will get throat chopped.  Relationships require accommodation and sometimes you just can’t make it work.  Personally, I don’t agree with that sentiment, we’re never too busy for anything we truly want.  If your biggest deterrent of giving yourself to someone is the inconvenience then maybe feelings need to be reevaluated.  Was that a shot at myself? Idk, moving on. 

The scariest thing about falling in love, falling out. The initial feelings of falling are euphoric and peaceful but eventually the pessimist in you can’t help but think about the last time.  When you find yourself feeling the way you used to feel….thinking about the possibilities you lost hope on….you want to believe it’ll be different, but can you be sure?  You can’t.  Love isn’t fear, it’s…..peace.  It’s security, it’s worth the trouble, it changes perspective.  Falling in love is scary because there’s risks, but to that same extent there’s just so much to gain.  Still ain’t sh t tho.  

-Stan-

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One response to “Today’s Word is… FALLING

  1. Pingback: Today’s Word is… ABANDONMENT | Stan of Few Words

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