My four passions, art, writing, women and sports. One of those passions, I have yet to date a woman who shared it. Now if you guessed “women”, you are incorrect and clearly missed the dead giveaway in the title. The correct answer is sports, I’ve yet to date a sports fan, which is perhaps rare these days. I’ve dated women who tolerated sports, they’d sit and watch a football game with the promise I would channel surf during commercials and agree to sit through a reality show to be named later. I’ve dated women who watched enough local news to know Aaron Hernandez is not the same guy from the State Farm commercials *le sigh*, but anyone who isn’t transcending the sport, she.o.e.n.o.
This was my random thought as I was half zoning out talking to this woman at Happy Hour. I bore easily. Anyway, she was explaining how she became a fan of her teams; Heat, Giants, Yankees, Lakers. She was from DC, I think. I wasn’t sure if she was just a bandwagoner or a troll. Now I’m from Boston, Massachusetts born and raised, on the playground is where I spent of my days, my local team fanhood was instilled from birth, I couldn’t imagine rooting for anothesr team, let alone THOSE particular squads. She waved to someone she knew, I made a sly remark about how Heat fans are always looking for the next thing, she fired back about how she ain’t know Boston fans came in black. Quick on her feet. She gets a point.
Shots were downed and fired and it turned out she was cool for a Laker fan. Perhaps too cool to be one as fans of teams have certain stigmas to them. Studies (and by studies i mean just made this up) suggest that the team you root for is indicative of the types of people you date. So for fun I decided to do some of the more common fan/dating stereotypes.
Cowboys fan- The Cowboys fan is loyal to a fault. Came for what you were, won’t leave for what you keep telling her what you might be
Lakers fan – She’s dramatic and confrontational. Everyone is hating and jealous of her, according to her. More about being seen than you know, seeing you
Heat fan- She down for as long as you’re up, enjoy her while it lasts
Eagles fan- You know shes not in it for the superficiality, you aint got much. She’s one of the realer ones, forgiving, honest but keeps getting her heart broke
Knicks fan- She’s extra. She on cloud 9 she’s at rock bottom with hardly any middle ground. The fights are devastating, the small gestures mean the world to her.
Celtics fan- She’s the type who likes to remind you what you put her through. She was there for every trial and tribulation and will constatly say she at the brink but never go anywhere
But of course I’m only speculating….cause I aint ever date sports fan.