Today’s Word is… TIMING

The modern workplace is biased against the childless. Yeah, I said it.  Unless your boss is a complete douche, when it comes to attendance, parents typically get an unspoken pass as long as it involves their child.  Understandable because you don’t want to come between one and their child, you gon make someone around you catch a body like that.   If I was a parent, I wish a boss would tell me I can’t get my sick kid from school, I’d smack the Windsor out his tie.  It’s the ultimate trump card, you can’t top it.  Me, oh forget my plant, pet or date, you gon’ get this work.  No convenient excuses at my disposal.  In break ups, there’s few convenient outs.  You can be the first “technically active” gay athlete in major professional sports or you can play the timing card.  Timing puts a neat little bow on everything; I’m not looking for this right now, now in a couple years I probably will be and if they ever build time machines I would go back and warn me now not to step to you yet but for now, yeah it just ain’t going down like that. Okay, maybe not so neat.   However, the premise is legit, sometimes it’s just a right person, wrong place, right time thing.

Doesn’t mean I necessarily agree. 

Personally, I never bought too much into it.  I can think of maybe two relationships that might’ve lasted longer had we met today rather than when we did. The rest, if it didn’t work then it wouldn’t now.  “Perfect girl, wrong time” is pretty much the same as someone being “overqualified”, it sounds good but….you’re still being rejected.  I said the other day, relationships are an agreement of expectations, “timing” only comes in the way when one or both parties are not holding up their end of the bargain.  You’re expected to be faithful, you knew that when you came in, temptation knocks on the door and suddenly you’re just not in the right place for a relationship, OK. Of course, there’s times when maybe you realize you bit off more than you could chew. Example, You’re expected to make reasonable time for your partner, you understood this initially, it’s when you keep getting  calls about how you never call that you realize, maybe I’m not quite as ready as I thought. 

We prioritize everything, you don’t spend rent money on clothes (I would hope), you don’t choose your friend over your child (I would hope).  Timing plagues a relationship because at the end of the day, their happiness is just not that important.  I’ve played the timing card a few times, it made sense in the moment but I knew deep down if I wanted her bad enough I would’ve made it work.  I’ve had the timing card played on me, if she wanted me bad enough she would’ve made it work.  We kid ourselves sometimes, leave false hopes and open doors and then when someone who is worth prioritizing comes along, ol girl still holding her ticket wondering how she got skipped in the line.  You wasn’t ready for a relationship like last week now you you’re swooned.  Timing didn’t change, your priorities did. 

Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but why not be real and not try to rationalize is using the logic of rappers and ball players.  Moving an hour away shouldn’t of been a hinderance, but I allowed it to be.  Plenty of full time students balance school work and a boyfriend, she didn’t want to be one of them.  Rather than state so we play to egos, convince the other that they would be perfect in a different time, give theories that are impossible to prove.  What’s the perfect girl, if it’s not the perfect time? Actually, the perfect girl makes it the perfect time.

-Stan-   

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